I hardly consider myself a romantic person. In fact, I used to resent everything romantic with a burning passion when growing up. This included movies, books, and real life. I have watched Titanic only once when I was about twelve, and I decidedly did not bat an eyelash when Jack sinks to the bottom of the ocean. I wore it like a badge of honor. Of course, this is completely normal, and I, like so many others, grew up reading first Nancy Drews, then Harry Potters, and later Agatha Christie’s books. Today I still mostly reach for nonfiction and works of fiction that do not revolve around falling in love. Some have even called my taste in books grave and depressing.

Yet, as I’ve grown up, I have pondered on why I rejected romantic storylines so strongly, even adamantly. I somehow almost saw enjoying these themes as showing weakness, while liking them behind closed doors. I would scoff at the romantic movies my sister would watch and instead watched whatever action film my dad had rented (spoiler alert: I do not particularly enjoy action films). When I was in my early twenties, I developed a habit of reading books with heavier topics and then reading a couple of trashy romance novels in between. I called it “balance:”

“I think my brain just needs a break from all those serious books and these romance novels with their predictable plots and happy endings are the solution.”

Now that I’m nearly thirty, I do not tend to often read romance novels anymore, especially to “balance things out.” I read them occasionally because I enjoy them. Furthermore, I wouldn’t refer to them as trashy anymore either. They have their time and their place and are an important escape for many a people – just like reading science or history books is to others. Let’s define what I mean by romance novels. Wikipedia classifies them as “type of novel and genre fiction which places its primary focus on the relationship and romantic love between two people, and usually has an ‘emotionally satisfying and optimistic ending.’” The romance novel industry is HUGE, while being extremely stigmatized. Most likely because women are its main consumers. And honestly, when I mentioned romance novels, I assume that for most of you, your mind conjured up images of red covers with passionate couples in each other’s arms. I have contributed to this stigma (and image) by talking poorly of the books, for example, by calling them trashy a few lines prior.

Now, let’s not get carried away. Many of them are not very good. The plots are flimsy and oh-so predictable, and the characters are underdeveloped. But then again, a large part of the industry is not about creating classics that will be read decades into the future. For many readers it is about instant gratification, a means to escape your daily life and the problems in it. The books are often short enough to be read in one sitting and are sold everywhere – even in grocery stores for easy access. Today you can find them in every single place online that sells books, ebooks, and audiobooks, and the prices vary depending on what kind of a romance novel you are looking for. The authors often write them quickly and they can be sold in bundles, where the side character from book one becomes the main character in book two and so forth. So, you truly get your money’s worth. Also, they come in every genre from your typical heteronormative to LGBTQ+ romance, and you can read them in various themes, like fantasy or horror. The genre truly caters to everyone.

Another question that I, who used to only read the genre in secret, have concerning romance novels, is that where do we draw the line? Are classics like Jane Austen’s books or Charlotte Brontë’s above this genre deemed trashy? After all, the main thing, and why many people read them, is the romantic aspect of them. I googled “Are Jane Austen’s books romance novels?” and came about many articles and blogposts of people trying to argue that they are not. Yet Wikipedia classifies them as romance novels (although Wikipedia is not the most reputable source, it is where most people find quick answers). Those wanting to separate these classics from the genre seem to often do so by pointing out the deep level of social commentary in the books. While I do somewhat agree with this point, I would like to say that many of those novels seen as the “trashy” examples of romance novels do contain some level of social commentary. For example, those written in the U.S. sometimes are centered on military veterans dealing with their life after service. Well, I am not here to settle this matter. I just find it curious how people would categorize these books, and how much of it is just based on the fact that the word romance novel has somewhat of a bad reputation. Of course, the romance novel genre is more divided than others into two polar opposites – there are those deemed respectable romance novels and then those cheap ones bought at the grocery store. And in the minds of those not familiar with the genre, there might not be a difference.

In all honestly, it is a bit awkward to write about this topic. Originally, I wasn’t going to – up until I started putting words on paper. I’ve become enamored with Austen’s works lately and in recent years been dipping my toes overall in the genre more, likely due to studying English. It has opened my eyes to think about the whole genre more, and why certain works, like the Twilight saga, 50 Shades of Gray books, Me Before You, and Crazy Rich Asians have grown in popularity, and become almost these modern classics. Clearly, some works are more appreciated than others, and some are still viewed with a scornful eye. But here we can perhaps see the difference in the intentions of the novels. The ones becoming bigger hits seem to usually be more worked on while there are those super short novels written for quick consumption. Those in my opinion are also a valuable part of the genre.

But in the end, I think we should read works that bring us joy. (Of course, this joy isn’t necessarily actual joy, I have read, for example, Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov and that was an awful experience, while it being an excellent book.) We shouldn’t really do what I did for so long and deny ourselves things based on how others view them. Whether it be crime books, young adult fiction, memoirs, studies, or romance novels, if it brings you joy in this specific moment in your life, enjoy it. It’s fine. It’s just books and genres. We really shouldn’t take ourselves so seriously all the time.

Photo by Sara Penttinen