Hello folks. Picture this: You're kicking it in your blanket fort enjoying a bag of your favorite crispy bits when suddenly boredom strikes - the other little death! The party at dude's house got busted - you won't be hanging there tonight. You'd call your buddy Cody, but his house has an elf infestation and he's locked himself in the closet. That weird guy who sleeps on the couch has stashed his magnet collection in your trunk and anything made of iron sticks to your car - statuary, hydrants, iron enriched cereal. You won't be driving anywhere, it's embarrassing. You're staying in tonight, so you switch on the tv. What's this! A stunted flipper man with a pigeon beak is staring you down in awkward silence. Quick, flip the channel! Oh no, now a suave yet inept spy is giving you the same treatment in closeup.

If you're like me, you've been having some serious ass stoner comedy problems. It's not that it's bad; it's just formulaic. Where's that wacky unpredictability you crave? You've seen FLCL over 50 times and there's only so many K-pop videos a person can watch.

Sifl and Olly, folks, the best sock puppet variety show of the late nineties. It's got songs, it's got comedy, it's got interviews with softly giggling creepers in snailsuits. What more do you want people!!! We're giving you occasional Björk worship and vintage VHS video quality.

Let's go to some some clips.

Interview Time - Tooth Fairy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_XEmZAxovg

Tooth Decay https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUrv9sh1xwU

Precious Roy - Luxury Coffins https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Aiwe429uic

A Word with Chester - Rain Tap Dance https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LkByP6gJTTo

A Word with Chester - Ladies https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=te6mJQOBU9U

Tangerine https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aOIufLMrTts

Precious Roy - Elf Hotel https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9hFOt49Umk

Dolores, Your Turtle is Dead https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KjqzQCgor_U

Dude's House https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yt8KHLsMBAk

Crazy Super Special Fun Day (Shiny Girl) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15ksvqlRRv8

And folks, as a bonus, we're throwing in a little something extra for the English majors. Never freeze up in a grammar exam again, just hum this song!*

The English Song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oY0WYdiO6TE

Toothfairies, elves, rain dances, mafia pet slayings — Doesn't that convince you? What more do you want, huh!? Let's go to the comments.

*Precious Roy's Home Shopping Netwerk will not be held liable for any resulting damages should you succeed in summoning Satan, or an English acrobatic safe cracking astronaut.