Chief Editor's Note: Spending Money

or A Glimpse into the Life of a Struggling Student

I bought a bouquet of white roses today. No, it’s not for a holiday, I’m not celebrating or mourning, nor am I the type of person to always have a bouquet of flowers on my dining room table. I bought the flowers for no reason in particular. I was just at the supermarket, saw a bunch of roses and decided to buy some on a whim. Do I really have the money to buy something just to buy it? No. Not in that sense, anyway. Then again the bouquet was maybe four euros but I also could have used that money to buy pasta and toilet paper or something like that. Or I could have saved it for some other purchase. But no, I bought the flowers.

I feel a tiny bit of guilt for buying something so frivolous. It’s not an investment toward my studies, my work, my entertainment or my future in any capacity. My student benefits have run out and my mental health benefits are certainly not large enough to compensate for that, as they only cover about 80% of the cost of my therapy sessions. I get some housing benefits, but those barely help me pay rent. I work, but I don’t get paid regularly enough to justify spending money on things I don’t really need. So why did I buy the roses?

Well, the long and short of it is because they brought me joy.

Flowers are beautiful. They may not last, but they liven up spaces nicely. And I enjoy the ritual of cutting the stems, trimming the leaves and making sure the flowers sit nicely in the vase I put them in. It’s a very small thing, but it delights me. And even if the roses won’t last months, they last long enough to bring me joy for weeks at a time. Some might note at this point that houseplants do the same thing and they also last longer, but I would argue against that. Taking proper care of a plant requires more than a vase and some water, because you have to purchase the right kind of soil, provide the plant with sufficient light and warmth, as well as put time and effort into researching what the plant in your house actually needs. Otherwise your plant will just wither away at some point, much like the flowers sitting on my windowsill. And besides, I have some plants that I bought years ago that are still very much alive that I need to take care of, and they’re not the same as the flowers.

But knowing all of that, why wouldn’t I just save the money for another purchase that might last me longer? Like a pack of pencils or a notebook? That’s easy to answer. Because I don’t actually need new ones right now, and won’t be needing new ones for a long time. And spending money on something that I might need in the future feels even more asinine than spending money on something that simply brings me joy.

I know my situation could be a lot worse in many ways. I work, so I get semi regular pay checks for that. Not regular or easy but money nonetheless. And I’m lucky enough to have parents that are willing to help me pay rent or buy groceries if it comes down to that. Without those support systems, I’d be much more burnt out and I don’t think I’d be buying those flowers for myself just to cheer myself up. But then I guess I’d just try to find something else to cheer myself up if I couldn’t get myself flowers.

Hope you all find some little joys in your daily lives this autumn and in the future.

Now I would like to wish you all a lovely rest of your day. But before you go, please check out the rest of this issue! In her BTSB debut, Venla tells us about her experience as a camp counsellor in the US, and writes some thoughts about balancing life and feeling tired as a student. Alexander starts a new series, The Record Shop, where you can explore the world of music with him. And if you’re looking for something to read instead, you could check out Valo’s short horror story or Robi’s book recommendations.