Chief Editor's Note: I’m Just a Short Person Trying to Eat: Happy Valentine’s – Take Care of Yourself

I'd like to start by painting a picture for you. Try to envision this.  It was a regular Tuesday evening; I was on the phone with my dear friend who I shall not name as it ascertains no relevance to this event. We were ever so reasonably and elegantly discussing the current challenges that us University students are faced with during this period of distance learning whilst the whole world is going through a pandemic that just doesn't want to end. One could say some lively descriptions of tech failures, lack of support, and unreasonable course loads were exchanged in varying degrees volume and vigor. It just so happens that I was also multitasking, as you do when you are a brilliant individual that often forgets to eat and must scramble to create something from the leftovers hiding in the fridge, by attempting to make myself a classic sandwich. Now, everyone who knows me, knows that I take sandwiches very seriously. It’s go big or go home for me when it comes to sandwiches. –Which sandwich was I attempting to make? –That’s a good question, one that I am more than happy to answer. The sandwich in question was a BLT, the simple yet tasty combination of bacon, lettuce, and tomato, neatly pressed between two buttered slices of toast. Easy peasy lemon squeezy, right? Well, that is what I thought until… my simultaneous ever so cathartic and lively conversation was rudely interrupted by an ungodly sound of screeching. The fire alarm in my studio apartment had decided to take serious offence with my frying of bacon and was insidiously blaring a sound so malevolent I just instantly wanted to make it stop. What’s a gal to do in such a situation? The answer is—anything and everything humanly possible. I rushed to open the window and immediately tried to reach up high to the ceiling to shut that damn thing off. Silence, mute, destroy. However, I found myself in the precarious situation of teetering on the edge of a stepping stool still a couple of inches short of reaching the fire alarm no matter how hard I tried to stand on my very tip toes. The mission was futile. I resigned to sticking my fingers into my ears and waited. A couple of seconds, ones that felt like hours, passed as freezing fresh air flooded my apartment effectively cutting off the blaring that had surely alerted all my neighbors of my cooking mishaps yet again. I am sure they are thoroughly annoyed with me or possibly just concerned by now. A frustrated grunt emanated from the wrangled blob of anxiety that I was, and I found myself once again, not talking, but yelling at an inanimate object. “For the love of God! I’m just a short person trying to eat! Why must you do this to me?”

I suppose the picture isn’t exactly a Picasso, but it does feel like it’s nearing a Dali. In addition to the story being a sadly funny anecdote, it does serve an actual purpose. The comical result of me yelling at my fire alarm over a BLT sandwich, did ring a very different, but equally important, alarm bell for me. I had burned my bacon and I had burned out all my energy. You don’t just end up yelling at a fire alarm out of the blue. It’s a gradual process. You might start with mumbling to your computer, snapping at your microwave, monologuing to your sink…you get the idea.

As it happens, our issue comes out on Valentine’s day, which we all know is an extremely commercialized holiday. Some would go far enough as to say it was invented by the greeting card industry, but that’s another story all together. However, with the year we’ve had and the year we are continuing to have, I’d say there’s worse things to celebrate than love. Even if the reason we do it is because we’re reminded by a capitalist holiday. If Valentine’s day is the thing that get’s our mind on love, then we’ll take it and run with it. So, let’s sprint! Valentine’s day is often associated with romantic love. In Finland the day is called ‘ystävänpäivä’, which translates directly into friend’s day. I actually tend to prefer that association, but that’s just me. Love is love. The one thing in common with both of these interpretations is that they remind us to direct our love to people we care about, friends, companions, partners. That’s a good enough reminder to have, however, this year I’d like to flip the switch a bit and talk about someone we often forget to care about –ourselves.

There’s a lot of talk about self-care, self-love, and ‘treating-yo-self’…but the reality is that the idea of doing something for yourself is still very much not status quo. Even just the notion of taking some time for yourself is thought of as a ‘treat’. It’s still very hard to wrap my head around the notion that doing something as necessary as self-care is viewed as a luxury instead of a necessity. I mean, it sounds like common sense to say that taking care of yourself is a necessity. Then again, I believe it was Voltaire who said that common sense is not very common, and in this case, I’m finding it hard to disagree. But I found myself thinking about the fact that even I, who pretty much has doctor’s orders to take a scheduled nap once a day, find it hard to take the time out of my studies and responsibilities to rest. And if no one else is going to say it, I will –that’s whack! So, when I find myself yelling at a fire-alarm for just doing its job, I can’t help but admit that I have not been a very good friend to myself lately. I have not shown myself the kind of love and care that I deserve. I don’t think I’d ever been the type of person to do things for myself just because. I’ve been very goal and task oriented, always trying to reach my full potential and put forth the best performance I can possibly muster. That worked up until a certain point, and then it suddenly didn’t. I had climbed very high and I fell very hard, and let me tell you, it was a hard pill to swallow. But it was a very important lesson for me to learn. I had to heal from my fall and rest. At first it was unbearable, I didn’t know what to do with myself. The incredible amount of guilt that consumed me over not being productive was pure insanity. And looking back at that, I realize now that the world we live in, is very obsessed with being productive. That world values the potential of our labor and the gain that can come from that. Thus, every moment we spend on ourselves, is like gain wasted to the demanding world.  

The past year has had me thinking about the ways we deal with loving and taking care of ourselves. The fact that we have now been forced to work and study from home has raised a lot of questions of efficiency and maximizing our time. I’ve heard a lot of comments on how people can get so much more work done from home, and how they can be constantly available etc. How ever positive this may sound to some, it makes me wonder about the consequences this situation is casting on all of us, who already push ourselves to the very max. Our homes have gone from the places where we relax, the places where we unwind and recharge to the places we also work and study in. The line between free time and work time has blurred and the longer this situation lasts the more that line will keep fading away. But we shall not fall into despair!

In the name of love and self-care, us here at BTSB would like to remind you that taking care of yourself is something you can and should prioritize. If you find yourself feeling guilty or antsy when you take an hour to yourself to nap or listen to music or to do whatever your heart desires, ask yourself –why? Why should you not be allowed to decide not to answer emails after eight PM? Why should you not be able to take a mental health day? Why should you not spend time investing in yourself? Why should you feel guilty for doing something you want to? Not everything worth doing has to be a necessity. Believe it or not, no matter what people try to tell you, you are actually allowed to enjoy your life. Not everything has to be productive or measured in value that can be perceived or gained by someone else. It’s only common sense to take care of the one person, who you will always be stuck with—yourself. So, for what it’s worth, in celebration of Valentine’s day, give yourself the gift of doing something nice just for you. Show yourself some love before you too find yourself yelling at your fire-alarm. It’s not a good look on anyone, trust me, I would know.

In case you need some self-care ideas to start with, let us suggest you put your feet up, grab a drink of your choice and have yourself a little break to browse through our fine collection of new articles.

If you’re in the mood for some well needed laughter, check out Henna’s SUB-board friend pages, we guarantee they’ll have you in fits of giggles. And if you want to read about the person in charge of all these delightful individuals, Henna’s got you covered there too with her interview of SUB’s new president! If it’s a break from scientific books and news you’re looking for, I suggest you take a look at Hanna’s touching short story or Leo’s beautifully crafted poem. On the other hand, you might want to read something uplifting and inspirational, just to bring your spirits up. In that case you should dive into Robi’s article on self-acceptance in quarantine or Leo’s thoughtful piece on searching for the light! Last but not least, if it’s expanding your horizons on romance books and tackling the tearing down of the suffering student, Sini and Annika have written some extremely thought-provoking articles for you to chew on and enjoy.

So, our dear readers, go forth and have a happy Valentine’s day!